Farewell 2006, Hellooooo 07!

Written 3 January 2007

2006 was good and bad for us, mostly good I think. Personally, it was a year of a lot of grieving for me, but I think I have made progress, and I feel good about the future for the 3 of us.

We moved yet again, weird circumstances, super stressful, but turned out to be absolutely perfect. Perfect house, perfect town, closer to the folks, and perfect school for our son. Fell into place amazing well, very much meant to be and we are incredibly happy here.

I spent a year studying italian and loved every second of it, though to become fluent would take a hell of a lot longer. I have a much better understanding than before, particularly reading comprehension, I loved studying the language!

J and I loooved watching the soccer world cup and seeing the aussies do so well, it was so exciting, many a late night and early morning screaming and jumping up and down was had! I still say we were robbed... ;)

The commonwealth games were held here in Melbourne.. turned out to be fairly low key, though I am still wondering what the hell the point of the duck was in the opening ceremony.

Our beloved Sydney Swans made the grand final second year running but we lost this one by ONE point. Heartbreaking but also exciting to watch.

We also watched with interest and baited breath when the 2 miners were trapped in the Tassie mine for 2 weeks, 1km underground. Terrifying, but they made it, remember watching that at 6am or so when they made it out, was such a relief for me as a stranger watching, imagine he families and their own. Amazing!

We went on holidays to Philip Island, was all about the F-man though, he was spoilt rotten and had a ball. As it was again in December when we had xmas parties, wiggles concerts and presents galore, and then a weekend back in Warrnambool, first time since leaving which was pretty cool.

Theres been hellish bushfires in our state this past month or so, when the wind is a certain direction, we have had scarily thick smoke right across the state, hundreds and thousands of kms from the fires. Visibility here is normally 20-30km or so, but was down to 2km. It was eery. In the towns closeby to the fires, it was like midnight in the middle of the afternoon it was so dark. Creepy... Then a week later they had snow there which helped.. but.. freak weather. Mother natures sooo pissed.

Lots of tragic losses in Australia this year, all in the last few months as well, Steve Irwin - that was heartbreaking. He was such a big character, and did so much for wildlife and conservation, kids LOVED him. It was sad, with 2 young kids, a devoted wife... just awful. Sure, sometimes I cringed at his larrikin behaviour, and wondered if he was for real but what a guy, what a loss.

Also, Peter Brock, a racing legend, just a few weeks later, and Colin Thiele, author of Storm Boy. Then Belinda Emmett, who fought cancer for so long, leaving behind her husband, Rove. Their love was so beautiful and obvious, and so precious and untouchable... so tragic. All losses that made me hold my husband and son a little longer, and tell them a little more often that I love them, life is truly too short.

So, what of 2007? I am determined to hunt my creativity gene down, starting with attempts at writing through my masters. My darling boy starts preschool 3 mornings a week, I am trying desperately not to think about it at the moment. I am going to miss him like crazy, I thought i had another year at home with him before this, but montessori starts this early. Hes sooo ready, he loved his 2hour a week sessions he did at the end of 2006. So that will be an adjustment - for me!
What else? I don't know, but I feel good about it, I feel like things are turning our way, and that good things are ahead. I hope so!

Happy New Year!

A year older, and the year ahead!

Written: 20 November 2006

It was my birthday last Thursday. Remember when that was a good thing?! I have begun the final year of my twenties, and I am clinging onto them for dear life. 30 next year, means I really am an adult, and there no escaping it. I am convinced I am still about 19. Somehow, ten years have passed and it has me beat how I missed them. They've been bloody good years though! J and I have been together for most of them, and still, I am sure it was only yesterday I fell in love with him at uni! And of course, the world was turned upside down in that time when our gorgeous boy arrived in the world. Youth is one thing, but I'd be old forever to have my little boy (if only I could keep him at this beautiful, 'mama is my world' age!)

So what of the next year? Someone asked this on a website I use and it was a good thing to consider. Bit early for resolutions (that I dont think I have ever kept anyway), but good to set some goals.

I applied to do a postgrad qualification so I am hoping I am accepted. I have been studying tourism, and I have enjoyed it, but I dont think it will fit with what I want the next few years of my life to be. Its all about long hours and shift work and rotating rosters. Thats fine when my boy, F, is a little older, but in his early school years, I dont want to be too far away. I could always return if I wanted to anyway.

So I thought I would dig out my so far useless Bach Arts degree and get a postgrad in teaching, and teach secondary for a while. Its the other job that has always held appeal for me. I could get the Grad Dip in Education next year and be ready to teach, but all I could teach would be philosophy, psychology and social ed/sociology. So I decided, I have 2 years before I want to go back to work fulltime, so I will spend next year getting a post grad in literary studies so I can add english to my potential classes. Admittedly, there is also an element in there of doing literature for the sheer pleasure of it. NERD!

Since F will be at kindergarten 3 mornings a week, I can study full time (have managed a half load the last 18 months with him home fulltime). I am going to need something to fill that time. I am dreading him going!

He has started last week doing 2hours a week to get him used to it for the 3 mornings next year. He LOVED it. I know he is so ready and will thrive, so I am happy, but of course, the part of me letting go for the first real time is sad. I feel like its the beginning of the end of my job as a full time mother... it is. But thats not entirely bad... just a wee bit sad. Its gone so fast and I have adored every second.

Which makes me think about the whole should we have more children thing again... Will make a decision in the next few months about returning to fertility treatment. Have had 12 months off now, and had decided that was it and was struggling to accept that. Then I realised I dont have to say its definitely over, I can always change my mind! It sounds simple but it was liberating. So, I'll decide... one day...

Speaking of infertility, next year a weekend away is being planned with the small group of women who have been like my support group through infertility. All 7 of us face fertility "challenges" (HA!) and have become like family, and we are scattered across Australia, so we have marked the long weekend in March as one we will spend together, drinking, eating and being merry! (Unless of course, theyre all up the duff, which would mean I'd drink alone for the 7 of us! Woot!)

Also want another holiday with my boys next year, and to spend more time with my beautiful little niece. I just feel like its going to be a good year.